References for teens

Teens 13–17 · Explainer · Updated October 1, 2026 · LearnLife Editorial

What Are References for Teens?

References are people who can share honest opinions about you to support your job or program applications. They help employers or organizations understand your strengths, skills, and reliability from someone other than you. For teens, references often come from adults like teachers, coaches, counselors, employers, or volunteer supervisors who have seen you in action.

Think of a reference as a personal or professional champion who “speaks up” for you. They confirm the qualities you list on your resume or application and help build trust. For example, if you say you’re responsible and hardworking, a reference can back that up with real examples.

References are different from friends or social media contacts because they need to be able to provide useful, professional information about your abilities. They are also different from letters of recommendation, which are written documents; references are people an employer might contact by phone or email.

How Do References Work? (With a Clear Example)

When you apply for a job or internship, you’ll often be asked to provide a list of references. This list includes each person’s name, how they know you (like “Mrs. Lee, my science teacher”), and their contact information (phone number and email).

Your potential employer will then contact your references to ask questions such as:

• How do you know the teen?
• What skills or qualities does the teen have?
• Is the teen dependable and hardworking?
• Would you recommend this teen for this position?

Here’s a clear example: Suppose you’re applying for a summer job at a local bookstore. You provide two references: your school librarian and your soccer coach. The bookstore manager calls your librarian, who says you’re organized and love books. The coach shares that you’re a team player and always show up on time. These positive responses help the manager feel confident in hiring you.

It is important to keep your references informed. Let them know when you apply for jobs so they are prepared if contacted. This also gives them a chance to think about what to say or ask for your resume to better understand your goals.

Why Do References Matter for Teens?

References matter because employers want to hire people they can trust to do a good job. Since teens often don’t have a long work history, references provide proof of your character and skills beyond what’s on paper.

Strong references can:

• Show you are responsible, reliable, and respectful
• Prove your ability to work well with others
• Help employers feel comfortable giving you a chance
• Make you stand out among many applicants

For example, if two teens apply for the same job and one has references who say they are hardworking and polite, while the other has none, the employer will likely favor the first.

Besides jobs, references are sometimes asked for in internships, volunteer programs, scholarships, or sports teams. Beginning to build good references early will benefit you throughout school and beyond.

What Are Good References for Teens?

Good references are adults who know you well and can honestly talk about your skills and character. You want references who:

• Have seen you in action (at school, sports, work, or volunteering)
• Can describe your strengths and positive qualities
• Are respected and trusted in their role

Typical good references for teens include:

• Teachers or school counselors familiar with your work and behavior
• Coaches or club leaders who can talk about your teamwork and commitment
• Past employers or supervisors from jobs, internships, or volunteer activities
• Mentors, religious leaders, or community leaders who support your goals

Avoid listing family members unless specifically asked. Also, don’t list someone as a reference without asking them first. This ensures they are ready and willing to help.

What Are References Not?

It’s helpful to understand what references are not to avoid common mistakes:

• References are not just any contacts or social media friends. They should be people with a meaningful relationship to your work or character.
• They are not the same as letters of recommendation. A letter is a written, formal praise, while a reference is a person an employer calls or emails.
• References are not people who will only say “yes” without knowing you well. Honesty is important.
• References are not a replacement for a resume or application but a supplement that adds credibility.

Knowing this helps you choose the right people who can genuinely support your application.

How Can Teens Prepare and Use References?

Preparing your references takes planning and good communication. Here are concrete steps you can follow:

1. Make a Reference List: Write down full names, phone numbers, email addresses, and how you know each reference (e.g., “Mr. Johnson, my math teacher”).
2. Ask Permission: Contact each person and ask politely if they would be comfortable being your reference. For example, you can say, “Would you be willing to be a reference for me as I apply for jobs this summer?”
3. Share Details: Tell your references about the job or opportunity you’re applying for so they can highlight relevant skills. You might say, “I’m applying for a babysitting job, so you might mention how I’ve been responsible during school projects.”
4. Provide Your Resume: Give your references a copy of your resume or application to help them remember your skills and experiences.
5. Keep Them Updated: Let them know when you’ve applied and if you get an interview or job offer.
6. Thank Them: Always thank your references both before and after they help you, either in person, by phone, or with a note.

By following these steps, you make it easier for your references to support you and show that you are responsible and professional.

What Should Teens Do Next About References?

Start by thinking about adults in your life who know you well and could be references. These could be teachers you trust, coaches, past employers, or community leaders. If you don’t have work experience yet, focus on adults who have seen your dedication in school or activities.

Build positive relationships with these people by showing respect, being responsible, and communicating your goals. When you apply for jobs or internships, prepare a professional reference list with up-to-date contact information.

Also, practice talking about your skills and experiences confidently. If you want to improve your chances, explore related resources like how to write a resume for teens or how to find a mentor. These will help you build your career skills step by step.

Remember: good references aren’t just for now—they can help you in college, jobs, or other opportunities later on, so maintaining these relationships over time is valuable.

Frequently asked questions

Can family members be references for teens?

Usually, family members are not considered good references because employers want honest, unbiased opinions. It’s best to ask teachers, coaches, employers, or other adults who know your work or character well.

How many references should I list on a job application?

Typically, three references are enough. Choose people who can speak to different parts of your experience, such as a teacher, a coach, and a past employer or volunteer supervisor.

What if I don’t have any job experience to get references?

You can use teachers, coaches, or adults you’ve volunteered with. Even if you haven’t worked before, these people can describe your skills, attitude, and responsibility.

How do I ask someone to be my reference?

Politely ask in person or by email, explaining what you’re applying for and why you’d appreciate their support. For example, say, “Would you be comfortable being a reference for me as I apply for my first job?”

Can I give my references a copy of my resume?

Yes. Sharing your resume helps references understand your skills and experiences so they can provide a detailed recommendation.

Should I check in with my references after getting a job?

Yes. It’s polite to thank them again and let them know you got the job. Keeping good relationships is helpful for future opportunities.