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Lesson plans about tantrums

Short answer

A tantrums lesson plan helps teachers and homeschoolers guide children through recognizing, understanding, and managing big feelings that cause tantrums. By targeting preschool and middle school learners with developmentally appropriate activities, discussions, and calming strategies, the plan builds emotional regulation skills and empathy in a supportive environment.

What grade bands are suitable for tantrums lesson plans?

Tantrums lesson plans can be adapted to a range of age groups, mainly preschool through middle school, with each grade band requiring specific approaches to match developmental readiness. For preschoolers (ages 3-5), the focus is on building basic emotional awareness—helping children identify and name feelings like anger, frustration, and sadness. Activities include simple stories, face cards, and practicing gentle calming techniques like deep breathing. At this stage, the goal is to teach children that feelings are okay, but there are better ways to express them than through tantrums.

For early elementary students (kindergarten through 2nd grade), lessons expand to recognizing common triggers, such as feeling tired, hungry, or misunderstood, and learning verbal skills to express emotions instead of acting out. Role-play and group discussions around personal experiences can help children see that everyone has big feelings sometimes. Middle schoolers (grades 6-8) are ready for more complex understanding of why tantrums happen—exploring the biology of emotions, the social impact of outbursts, and strategies for self-regulation and peer support. They can work on identifying their own triggers in journals or small group discussions and practice calming and problem-solving techniques.

Grade BandLearning ObjectivesEstimated Time
Preschool (3-5)Identify feelings, recognize big emotions, calm down30-40 minutes
Elementary (K-2)Recognize triggers, express feelings with words, calming40-50 minutes
Middle SchoolUnderstand tantrum causes, emotional self-awareness, empathy, coping45-60 minutes

Adapting the lesson to developmental levels ensures that children are neither overwhelmed nor under-challenged, creating a strong foundation for emotional well-being.

What materials are needed for a tantrums lesson plan?

A tantrums lesson plan uses materials easily found in most classrooms or homes, eliminating the need for printables or special resources. Here is a detailed list:

By using familiar materials, teachers and homeschoolers can easily implement lesson plans without extra preparation or expense, focusing instead on interaction and emotional learning.

How can teachers warm up the lesson on tantrums?

The warm-up sets the tone and helps children connect with their own experiences around feelings and tantrums. Here are three concrete warm-up activities:

  1. Emotion Charades: Invite students to take turns acting out an emotion (like anger, sadness, happiness, or frustration) without words, while classmates guess. This playful activity builds emotional vocabulary and nonverbal understanding. For example, a child might stomp their feet and frown to show frustration, prompting guesses like "angry" or "mad." This encourages kids to recognize physical signs of emotions.
  1. Feelings Circle: Gather students in a circle and ask each child to name one feeling they have experienced recently. Model by saying, “I felt happy this morning,” then go around the circle. Reinforce that all feelings are normal and important. This promotes openness and normalizes talking about emotions.
  1. Story or Video Clip: Share a brief story or video showing a character having a tantrum. Pause to ask, “How do you think this character feels? Why?” This anchors the lesson in a concrete example and encourages empathy. For preschoolers, choose simple stories, and for older children, select clips showing realistic emotional responses.

These warm-up activities prepare students to engage thoughtfully in the lesson and create a safe space for sharing.

What points should be covered in direct instruction?

Direct instruction gives children clear, understandable information about tantrums and emotions. Use simple, concrete language and examples. Key points to cover include:

Providing clear definitions and practical strategies helps children understand their emotions and what they can do about them, empowering them to manage big feelings better.

What are effective main activities for teaching about tantrums?

Hands-on activities engage learners and reinforce concepts through practice. Here is a suggested sequence of activities with detailed steps:

  1. Emotion Sorting Game: Prepare picture cards showing different emotions. Ask children to sort them into two piles: “calm feelings” and “big feelings” (such as anger or sadness). After sorting, discuss why some feelings feel bigger or stronger. For example, “Why do you think being angry feels bigger than being happy?”
  1. Trigger Brainstorm: Invite students to share times when they have felt upset or frustrated. Write their responses on the board or chart paper. Use prompts like, “What are some things that make you feel like yelling or crying?” This validates children’s experiences and helps them identify personal triggers.
  1. Calming Practice: Teach and practice a calming technique together. For instance, lead a deep breathing exercise: “Breathe in slowly through your nose for 4 seconds, hold for 2, then breathe out through your mouth for 6 seconds.” Use a timer or count aloud. Repeat a few times, inviting children to notice how their body feels afterward.
  1. Role-Play Scenarios: In pairs or small groups, children take turns acting out a situation that might cause a tantrum and then demonstrating a calming response. For example, one child might pretend to be frustrated because they can’t have a toy, and the other helps them calm down by suggesting breathing or asking for help. Afterwards, discuss what worked well.
  1. Creative Expression: Have children draw or write about a time they felt upset and what helped them calm down. For younger kids, drawing faces or scenes works well; older children can write short sentences or stories. Sharing these helps kids reflect and practice emotional vocabulary.

These activities combine cognitive, social, and emotional learning, making the lesson memorable and applicable.

What discussion questions help deepen understanding?

Discussion questions encourage students to think critically about emotions and behavior, developing empathy and self-awareness. Use open-ended questions such as:

Encourage students to answer in complete sentences and follow up with prompts like, “Can you tell me more about that?” or “How did that make you feel?” For middle schoolers, add questions about how tantrums affect friendships or schoolwork, fostering deeper reflection on social consequences.

These discussions help children connect their learning to real life and build emotional intelligence.

How can educators assess understanding and provide an exit ticket?

Assessment should be supportive and simple, focusing on children’s ability to recognize emotions and calming tools. An effective exit ticket might ask students to:

For example, a student might say, “I learned that counting to ten helps me feel better,” or draw a sad face next to a happy face. This shows comprehension and readiness to apply skills.

Teachers can collect these exit tickets privately or invite voluntary sharing to maintain a safe environment. For middle school learners, a short written reflection or journal entry about what triggers their own big feelings and how they can respond can serve as a more advanced assessment.

How can homeschoolers differentiate or extend the lesson?

Homeschoolers have flexibility to tailor the lesson to their child's interests, needs, and pace. Here are ways to differentiate and extend:

These extensions help build lasting emotional skills and create a supportive learning environment tailored to each child’s unique needs.

Frequently asked questions

How can I adapt tantrums lessons for middle school students?

Middle schoolers benefit from exploring the biology behind tantrums, understanding personal triggers, and practicing emotional self-awareness. Use journaling, role-playing, and group discussions to foster empathy and problem-solving. Encourage peer support skills like listening and validating feelings, helping teens manage frustration more independently.

What are simple calming techniques for preschoolers during tantrums?

Preschoolers respond well to easy, sensory-based calming tools like deep belly breaths, counting slowly to five, hugging a favorite stuffed animal, or sitting quietly in a cozy corner. Visual or musical aids, like a calming song or a glitter jar, can help them focus and relax.

What signs indicate a tantrum is starting and how can I intervene?

Signs include increased restlessness, louder voice, frowning, clenching fists, or stomping. Intervene by calmly acknowledging feelings (“I see you’re upset”), offering choices (“Would you like to take some deep breaths or sit in the calm corner?”), and guiding the child gently to a calming activity before the tantrum escalates.

Can tantrum lessons help children with special needs?

Yes, tantrum lessons adapted with visual supports, consistent routines, and individualized calming strategies can be very effective for children with special needs. Focus on teaching emotional vocabulary, sensory regulation, and communication methods suited to each child’s abilities.

How do I talk to parents about tantrum lessons?

Explain that the lessons teach children to understand and manage big feelings safely. Share simple strategies families can use at home, like calm-down corners and breathing exercises. Encourage parents to use consistent language about emotions and support their child’s progress by practicing calming skills together.

More on kids’ big feelings →

Sources and further reading

Everyday coping skills, not medical or mental-health treatment. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) in the US.